Christmas 2011

Christmas.
It is such a magical holiday full of everything.

Mor Mor has been here this year and we had a lovely, smaller, gathering for Christmas eve and again today for Christmas. We had friends over both days and that felt perfect. We took a hike early Christmas eve with other families and this lead to an unfolding of many good things.
Games, play, gifts, cooking, seriously delicious meals, the colors red and green, anticipation, perhaps some disappointment...(Kuba did not get a bird, Anders did not get a remote helicopter) but this seemed minor as the holiday whizzed by.

I think that I've been more introspective, more thoughtful this holiday. Thinking about what makes a holiday feel full, happy, enough. We have so much. Gratitude. How to raise children to feel gratitude for everything that gifts or blesses them. It's a big deal to me and I am thinking a lot about this right now. I want my children to feel deep gratitude and when they have so much it's important to also figure out how to balance all this that they have with appreciation.

I myself will try to spend the week being thoughtful about the things in my life that I feel enormous gratitude for. I will also reflect on what seems to throw me off center and how to build more into my life that fufills me and keeps me solidly resilient.

Highlights from the holiday:

Amazing meals both days; making pierogi with Anna and making mushroom soup with uski; roasted lamb on Christmas, followed by a flourless chocolate cake.
Simply delicious and fufilling meals.

Kuba and Anders so excited, anticipatory, happy to unwrap, play, enjoy the moment.

Beautiful dishes, tablecloths from Sweden, holiday decor that feels so good to look at and have around.

Playing charades, scooting and racing the boys on the basketball court Christmas day.

Reading with the boys.

Watching Kuba and Anders reading Kuba's ABC's together.

Getting a chicken whirligig that Anna made with the boys. (I've been wanting a whiligig!)

Adopting a stray cat that Kuba is simply in love with.
Watching him cozy up to the cat and gently rub his cheeks on the cats soft fur.
Watching him laugh with delight as the cat jumps and plays with a catnip mouse on a string.

Knowing that this...this is my family.
How lucky we are.
Merry Christmas to my dearest, most amazing family.

Decorating for the Holidays

We've brought up the decorations from the basement and spread them throughout the house....ornaments, lights, bird nests, christmas books, tops and a wind-up collection, nutcrackers, etc. All fun, all carefully unpacked and brought back out. This year Anders and Kuba really played with the toys, remembering them from last year, and they also helped with the decoration of the christmas tree. Wind-ups have been scattered across our floor, christmas books have been read and re-read, and the boys are working on their top spinning techniques. We've also begun the great task of baking....pepparkakor, cut outs, macaroons, gingerbread house, saffron bullar, etc. It's been busy around here. We're moving at about 1000 miles per hour and our house reflects the speed. It's messy these days. I can't imagine what it's going to take to slow down, get our house back to order and simply be in this holiday season. Lots more to do in the next 5 days!

Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree

OH, my boys!

Thanksgiving 2011

If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, "thank you," that would suffice.
~Meister Eckhart

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Playing together

Mini Picasso

It's true. I do think Kuba is a creative kid. When presented with a whole stack of paper and a bucket of markers this is the series he came up with. Anna was struck by these drawings and saved all of them. When I got home she and Kuba went through the pile with me, both of them beaming. I can not express enough how much fun it is to see your own child's creative mind expressed visually. Sometimes I think he'll be a musician, other times a visual artist, other times an inventor...and sometimes on a really bad day I can't quite figure out what he'll be but I think it might involve pushing and hitting. AH, the absolute thrill of parenting. Vulnerabilities and strengths all wrapped up into one little body and we get to witness all of it.

Haikuba

Four years ago in
the hospital, his hair dark
feet tiny, soft skin
.
precipitous entrance
with doctor running to catch
his watery arrival
.

all of us eager
to welcome the one seeking
home in this family
.
it was a journey
him to us, us to him
lucky in love we are

LOVE THIS BOY

Every morning in pre-k, kids have to write their name on a little laminated name card. When they are young they just need to trace over their letters with a dry erase marker. Once they have mastered this they turn the card over and form the letters entirely by themselves.
Kuba was writing his name today and noticed that the K was up much higher than the other letters in his name. He said to Anna, "Oh, I just need to put a trampoline under the K."
Needless to say - his mind is a miracle. The way he thinks about things is dazzlingly creative.
Not a day goes by without some truly interesting, funny, or wacky thing coming out of him. All the while we are laughing and in awe. Love. Big, big love over here.

Happy Birthday Kuba!

Wake up sleepy four year old!

Our family tradition is to make a birthday tray with breakfast, flowers, candle and birthday present...and then wake up the birthday person. This morning Anders awoke at 5 a.m. eager and ready to get the tray ready for Kuba. We were able to postpone it until 6:30 hoping Anders would fall back asleep, but he just couldn't. So we tromped downstairs, got the birthday breakfast tray ready and then went back upstairs singing Happy Birthday all the way.
Kuba was so sleepy it took about four rounds of Happy Birthday and lots of gentle shaking from Anders until Kuba's sweet little self woke up.

I can't believe he is now four years old.
It's been a full year of being three with lots of growth. Not only is Kuba tall, but he's smart as a whip. He is also feisty, passionate, creative, and SO FULL OF ENERGY.

This was the year of the stutter, when Kuba's muscular coordination for speech was colliding with his blossoming vocabulary. Right hemisphere/left hemisphere striving for balance. He regained his verbal gait quickly and continues to be a fast talker with an amazing vocabulary. He is a funny boy with a quick wit. He is also an inventor and a game creator.

This was also the year of his imaginary friends. Bingo, Eli, and Eggy have been a very active part of his imagination for so long now that we have all grown to love these little characters...a rabbit, a lion, and a cheetah. They accompany us most always these days and the progression of details that unfold around them continues to amaze. Recently Kuba took us all for a walk to show us where they live (they live in a house in the grass in front of QT's - a local creamy joint) and recently their mother has come into the picture. She doesn't have a name though. For me these imaginary friends are yet another indicator that this little boy has one hell of a creative imagination.

Kuba has been taking dance and drama classes this year as well as gymnastics class. He's absolutely full of life and everything he does has some form of rhythm and movement in it. His musical instincts are unbelievable and it's been like this since he was a baby. He got a super guitar from his grandfather for his birthday and we added an old drum set to the collection of instruments he already has. We are still thinking and wondering about how best to meet his need and instinct for music.

I remember before Kuba was born when we were just a family of three and it was just Anna, Anders and I, I couldn't imagine how life would be with another baby...and now I can not imagine life without him. What an incredible, incredible little boy he is. Happy Happy birthday Kuba! May your fourth year be full of rhythm and joy.

The Best of Halloween 2011

Autumn Leaves

My boys are always so willing to join in some big activity if it involves doing, and I am so very grateful for this. Today it was another "leaf day" at our house. Fall doesn't really last too long - at least the beautiful saturated colors of fall leaves. I remember ironing leaves between sheets of wax paper with my mom when I was a kid and then using them as fall decorations. The smell of that warm leaf is etched into my memory. As an adult I've tried all sorts of ways to capture the autumn leaf and bring it inside, but it always fades to brown and crumbles. Today the boys and I played in the park and on our way home we collected some pretty amazing maple leaves; yellow, bright orange, and red-orange with bits of green. I decided to coat them with mod podge as a way to extend their brilliance and beauty, even if only for a little while. So the boys and I got busy painting leaves. I've been sewing them on a thread, (sort of like popcorn on a string) trying to make a garland long enough to hang above our kitchen counter. When the painting was finished, my kids ran back out into the back yard where they played until dusk. Climbing the apple tree, running in and out of the chicken coop to welcome our new adopted chicken, and in general just being kiddish. It was a wonderful Fall Sunday at home.

Beach Math

Our trip to the cape this past week was full of everything: fun, love, automobile breakdowns, frustration, worry, play, sun, big sky, and of course beach rocks. I came straight to the cape after having been at a parent teacher conference for Anders and I think school was steeped into my brain. I was thinking a lot about how to enhance learning and the love of learning at home. I thought about this off and on for hours as I was driving. So, we played a lot of fun made up games that were centered around math and reading and science. One truly fun game we created was a spontaneous game called "Guess my theme." I would categorize this as a definite math game. Each of us had to find rocks and create a small group sorted by whatever theme we chose. If you look at the groups above you can see we had the grown-up and simple white rock group, the amber rock group, the freckled group, and then a few way more fun and interesting groups by Kuba and Anders....the big-small-big-small group, the mama-baby group, the bumpy-rock group, and the rocks-with-holes in them group. FUN was had by all. And it made me think that school on a beach would be a terrific way to learn. We also got to inspect a dead seagull and a small dead and decomposing whale. TERRIFIC. Serious learning going on.

And Almost Four

My amazing little three year old.

First Homework Assignment in First Grade

Anders is doing a unit at school that begins with home and moves outward to town, state, country, and continent. This prompted his first homework assignment ever. With help from a parent he was to build his bedroom in 3-D. Cool! Anna, being the architect that she is, had him draw each plane of his room because she wanted him to observe and document everything that he saw. He really took it to heart, all the way to the smoke detector and the glow in the dark stars. His details are pretty amazing if you look carefully at the drawings. This was followed by measuring the room so they could scale it. Then they brainstormed different ways he could portray the different objects in his room and together they decided what materials to use. Anders took photographs of some of the things in his room, especially the things on his wall. Anna showed Anders how to scale down the photographs in a computer program so they could be used (she is telling me that he did it on the computer himself.) And then the building began...re-creating his bedroom - materials included fabric, wood, cardboard, paper towel, colored paper, cotton balls, photo of things in his room, etc. If you look carefully you can even see him and Kuba in their beds. Pretty wonderful, don't you think? I love my family!

Autumn Hikes

We took two fantastic hikes this weekend and I have to say that hiking with the boys is probably my most favorite way to spend time with them. I loved every single minute of it.

Spontaneous Sunday

Today it was rainy, cold, dreary, and relentless.

And then things got interesting.
People kept stopping by at our house. I was on the couch reading to Kuba when the doorbell rang. Our neighbor down the road stopped by with food for our chickens and her 2 1/2 year old son. Not more than five minutes later, Anders came home from a playdate, playdate in tow. Again, about five minutes later the doorbell rang again and three more friends and their mom stopped over. Imagine going from one child to seven in a matter of minutes.

This could have easily turned into chaos, as every kid needed to do some gross motor playing...it started with lego's and puzzles which were quickly becoming the new floor cover. I then introduced the "art project." Crayon leaf rubbings and watercolor. Simple, fun and soon we had many colorful papers lined up across the counter to dry. Four are now on our front door welcoming Autumn.

There you have it, a reversal of the mood in no time at all.

Connection Made

Anders has entered a phase where he has recently become very concerned about dying. It rose to the surface last week and it has been extremely upsetting to him. At times he has been perseverating over it, and making himself an anxious wreck because he "just can't stop thinking about it." He's been asking questions like, will it hurt, will he be lonely, is it scary, when is his next birthday because he doesn't want to grow any older and get any closer to dying, etc. At first we couldn't figure out where his fear came from, it felt so out of the blue. Yet it is a very serious concern for him right now. We have been talking to him and talking to others to get some advice about how to talk to him about death. and ease some of his fear. Yesterday when talking to him, as Anna was trying to figure out what might have been the catalyst for his fear, he was able to articulate that it started when he was lying on the floor, on his back, being really quiet and still, and it made him think about being dead.
It took me awhile, but tonight I think I made the connection.
Anders has been going to an art class at the local museum and for the first two visits the kids have been fascinated with the mummy in the museum's collection. The mummy is lying on it's back, still and quiet. These fears began after the kids spent some real time last Wednesday focused on this mummy. The mummy is not much bigger than Anders. I can totally see how he would feel a connection to this ancient dead mummified body after lying still on the floor in the exact same position.
Not that it makes it any easier explaining and talking to him about this complex and mysterious aspect of life. It makes it even more difficult when you are not a member of an organized religion that certainly can direct conversation about what happens after life. Being a mom is seriously intricate. Piecing together tons of fast moving bits of information to guide you in this often mysterious journey of raising and attending to the emotional needs of your children.
Oh, to be so blessed!

Hammers Are Fun to Play With

But not if you get a nail in your shirt and your body. That's not fun at all.

My Little Baker

Kuba is very interested in baking cakes. Lots of kinds of cakes, I might add. Porcupine pie, mud pie, tigger cake, etc. You get the idea. Anna found an old party cake book my mother had when I was a kid and he is crazy about it. When he first saw it he went through it page by page with a pack of little yellow sticky notes marking every cake he liked. It was every cake in the whole book. Now he just carries it around a lot dreaming about the time he will bake all of these very tacky/adorable desserts.

Anyway, today we made the tigger cake that is in the book. Hysterical. Luckily it was just for us and not to be presented anywhere at some important event. He helped me bake it today after his pre-school day ended and then he and Anders decorated it after Anders got home from school. It's pretty gross looking, but to them it is absolutely awesome.
Ironically, my little cake and candy lovers told me they were so tired tonight after dinner that they wanted to save the cake until the next day. Weird, right?
So, it's tigger tomorrow. Who knows what it will be the next time we bake.