I am going to a 6 week parenting class, and even though it's only week 3, I feel myself slipping lower and lower into my chair - oh boy. I think I am learning a lot. Last nights topic was "praise" and I think we have a praise junkie on our hands thanks to me (and Anna?)
Thinking about how you speak to your children is hard work. Noticing how quickly "good job" blurts out of your mouth is a terrifying realization. Hearing "watch me, watch me" over and over again from the mouth of a 3 year old is something I am being told is not ideal. Attention child. A child used to getting lots of attention and not necessarily for important reasons. I learned that kids who get praise all the time, have low self-esteem. I learned that kids who get praised a lot are at-risk kids. Because they fall prey to anyone who gives them attention... Because they learn that what you think of them is more important than what they think of them.
This has been one wild month. SO much focus on how to parent well, how to parent capable, responsible, independent kids. UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!! It feels a bit daunting when your whole house was built out of playing cards but you thought they were bricks.
More on this.....
2 comments:
Be careful how quickly you discard everything you've been doing so well. You and Anna are fabulous loving attentive responsive parents. You are aware and noticing of your kids. Don't let one outside source pull the rug out from under you. Just because it's a class, doesn't mean it is some kind of absolute truth to be swallowed whole!
Sending you guys lots of love and support! ~ Julie & Cynthia
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